” I sat there, lost and cold because I was betrayed by the one person I didn’t expect to hurt me. I wanted to erase the memory but that’s unrealistic; then, a magic moment happened. I forgave them. Even though it hurt like hell, forgiveness brought me freedom, joy and happiness. I was no longer a slave to my circumstances”
Forgiveness is a deep process, which is repeated over and over again in our hearts. It honors the grief and it honors the betrayal. And in its own time it ripens into the freedom to truly forgive. – Gina Sharpe ” The Power of Forgiveness”
Do you ever stop to think that when you have unforgiveness in your heart and you keep dwelling on a situation that happened in the past, that you withhold yourself from enjoying life and living life in abundance? When you walk around pouting , murmuring and complaining about what someone did to you, you are giving that someone the power to run your life. Now I understand if its fresh and happened that day , the day before but when it goes into weeks, months even years especially years it’s time to get out your feelings and move on with your life. We should never let unforgiveness fester in our hearts because it does nothing but taint our spirit and make our hearts hard towards that individual.
Forgiveness does not excuse their actions but forgiveness is a reflection of loving yourself. When you love yourself you take control of your life and you do not let people and their behaviors take a hold of you. Especially as children of God we should want to walk in light and not have a dark cloud over us and carrying the burden and weight of unforgiveness on our shoulders. We want to let everyone see the presence of God over us and not anger and bitterness, no more living in our emotion and feelings. We let our emotions control us too much and it’s becoming second nature that we may not even realize that we are walking in our emotions. I had to learn through my walk with Christ ( I am still learning to this day) that people are going to hurt you as long as you have breath in your body. It’s life we may hurt someone, and someone may hurt us maybe not intentionally but we all will or have rubbed each other the wrong way. It is up to us with what we choose to do with that. Did you know that unforgiveness is a sin?
Have you taken the time out to think about how we hurt, offend and disappoint our Heavenly Father daily? But yet he is merciful and gracious to forgive us each and every time, we should have no problem forgiving one another. If you think about it we do not deserve God’s grace, as many warning’s as we get from reading his word about how we should live but continue to carry on in our flesh. God even blessed us (the church) with real Men and Women of God who hear from Him personally to give us warnings/rebukes, but we still carry on the same ol same ol as if we missed that service.
We grieve The Holy Spirit far worse then we hurt one another how you ask? By…
- walking in disobedience ( parents, pastors, the word of God)
- putting people, things, objects before him
- not walking in Love
- not sharing the word of God with others
- when we “repent” but continue to do the sin we “repented”for
- walking in rebellion
- when we use God to get things
and the list goes on and on.
Forgive and Forget
(KJV) Colossians 3:13; Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.
If you say you forgive someone then you must truly forgive them. One way to find out if someone really forgave you is if they consistently bring up what you did to them in the past and can’t seem to let it go. I see this a lot in relationships whether it be marriage, dating, or friendships. We have all seen it in movies and TV Show’s as well where it is usually the Man who does something ( sorry guys) to make the women upset and want nothing to do with you and he begs for her forgiveness and show’s how sorry he is by doing sweet gestures for his lady. The girlfriend or wife then forgive their loved one and everything is all cute and lovely. All that comes to an end when the Boyfriend/ Husband does something else that the girlfriend/ wife may find offensive or makes her mad, and she will proceed to bring up the past and say you were never sorry you continue to do this,that and the third and last month you did this and that… well guys guess what she never let it go and never forgave. The emotions and memories were tuck away in her back pocket in case she needed to take them out again.
When you forgive you forget as well or at least that’s what we are suppose to do. I know everyone thinks that we are suppose to forgive but not forget.. Well sorry to say this but that’s not how it works. When we forget it shows that we are starting over on a clean slate whatever happened in the past that is where we choose to leave it in the past. Some people including myself may have a hard time forgetting because it really hurt us or someone who we loved, and trusted betrayed you and your not sure if you could ever trust them again or have the same bond that you once shared. In order for us to have full control and not let the behavior of others take hold of us we need to be honest with ourselves and truly forget. When we let unforgiveness take residence in us that is were resentment, bitterness, hatred, strife comes into play. Letting those different spirits take hold of you only God knows what you are capable of doing and that’s a scary thought.
(KJV) Ephesians 4:31-32; Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.
Holding on to the past and being help captive in that moment can cause you to act out in ways that you probably never imagined. I remember when I was in college I was fresh in my walk with God ( i needed A LOT of deliverance) but there were some people who treated me unfairly they bullied me, would taunt me, say all types of things to and about me. I would cry , hold in the anger and frustration, drink my emotions away until I was numb and it got to the point where the spirit of murder came over me. I would have visions of myself committing horrible crimes against them (and it didn’t help that my major was criminal justice) and it got so bad that I honestly scared myself because that was not me at all. I knew right then and there I needed to get away from everyone be by myself get in the word and pray. It took time but I was able to forgive and forget and to this day I do not hate them I have not have hard feelings towards them. It feels good knowing that I can love on people who have done me wrong. That is when you know you are walking in light and maturing in God.
5 Way’s to help you Forgive others:
- Don’t deny that you’ve been hurt. Forgiving isn’t denying.
- Make a decision to forgive others ( Luke 17:3-5)
- Don’t seek revenge or repay evil for evil. Let God Handle it ( 1 Peter 3:9)
- Pray the Lord will release any anger inside you ( Ephesians 4:26-27,31)
- Pray for those who have hurt you ( Matthew 5:44)
Forgiveness and The Love of God ❤
(KJV) Isaiah 43:25-26 I, even I, am he that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine own sake, and will not remember thy sins.
Did you know that God Forgives us every time we sin? When we forgive others of their wrongdoing towards us God will forgive us. If we do not forgive others he will not forgive us. Think of one the the worst sin’s that you’ve committed and you know that if God had not been merciful and forgave you, you would have been on your way to hell with gasoline draws on. When we ask God for forgiveness we must truly want forgiveness and want to change. When we are forgiven we must turn from the sin and continue doing right. We will stumble and fall but it’s not about how we start but how we finish.The thing about this is that if we continue to sin and have no type of proof of us trying to change and grow,God will take his hands off of you and leave you to your sin. So do not think that just because God is merciful and forgiving that you can continue to get away with murder. You never want to be where God was but where he is.
(KJV) Romans 1:28-31 And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient; Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers, Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, Without understanding, covenant breakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful: Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.
God loves us and he wants to see us prosper and love one another regardless of how people treat us. We can’t say we are Christians (Christ-like) while walking around mad, holding a grudge, not wanting to forgive and just set in our ways. Jesus was betrayed, lied on, set up for death, and died an innocent man because of unbelievers and people who did not like him for the lies that people made up about him. Through it all Jesus forgave each and every single one of them.Even while he was dying on the cross a slow and painful death he asked the Father to forgive those that did him wrong because they did not know what they were doing. So think about that knowing that Jesus went through hell and was killed because of lies and betrayal He was still able to forgive and have love for his enemies we should be able to love those who do us wrong. We have it easy compared to what Jesus endured.
Unforgivness is also a form of rebellion and Rebellion open’s a door to the demonic in a person’s life. The Bible strictly warns us against rebellion, and it’s consequences are not to be taken lightly. God’s Word tells us that rebellion is in the same category of sin as witchcraft itself ( but i will touch on that in a different blog) ..
What if they continue to hurt or offend me?
The Scriptures below sum’s up what we are to do if someone we constantly forgive continues to hurt us. If you do not understand what they are saying they are saying to FORGIVE!! Continue to forgive them over and over and over again!
(KJV) Matthew 18:21-22; Then Peter came to Him and asked, “Lord, how many times will my brother sin against me and I forgive him and let it go? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered him, “I say to you, not up to seven times, but seventy times seven.
(KJV) Luke 17:3-4 Pay attention and always be on guard [looking out for one another]! If your brother sins and disregards God’s precepts, solemnly warn him; and if he repents and changes, forgive him. Even if he sins against you seven times a day, and returns to you seven times and says, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him [that is, give up resentment and consider the offense recalled and annulled].
So please everyone lets challenge ourselves to forgive daily even when it is hard, try to find the good in the person. Even if you have to be distant from that person have no hate or bitterness or unforgiveness in your heart towards them. We are to blessed and beautiful or handsome to carry the ugliness of Unforgiveness.
xoxo… God Bless ❤