Lady of Contentment

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Philippians 4:11-13(AMP)

11 Not that I speak from [any personal] need, for I have learned to be content [and self-sufficient through Christ, satisfied to the point where I am not disturbed or uneasy] regardless of my circumstances. 12 I know how to get along and live humbly [in difficult times], and I also know how to enjoy abundance and live in prosperity. In any and every circumstance I have learned the secret [of facing life], whether well-fed or going hungry, whether having an abundance or being in need. 13 I can do all things [which He has called me to do] through Him who strengthens and empowers me [to fulfill His purpose—I am self-sufficient in Christ’s sufficiency; I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him who infuses me with inner strength and confident peace.]

The Question I would like to ask you is, are you  content with where you are relationship wise? Or are you Discontent? You want Mr or Mrs. Right to come right now! Your losing faith, are you becoming anxious? 

So its February also known as the month of LOVE! Some of us who are single and have no one to share Valentine’s Day with can look at this month as dreadful and miserable. There is nothing more trying as a single person than living in a “couples world”. Trying to be content in a world where it seems like your non-existing love life is being dangled in front of you as a reminder of what you are lacking, can cause a lot of discontentment.  I know for me as I am currently in my single season it is easy to feel discouraged and can even make you ask yourself”what is wrong with me?” In reality there is nothing wrong with you it is just not your time.

Longing for something that you do not have is common and we all go through it. It is not just limited to us singles. Many of us desire certain things in life from financial abundance, children, buying a BIG house, owning your own business, traveling all over the world, but this desire I am talking about is having a relationship.

One thing I’ve learned as a single and heard countless of times from EVERYONE, is that if your discontent being single , you can count on being dissatisfied  as a married woman or man in the future. Never look for wholeness by being with someone. Only God can fill the void that you feel. It is best to wait for who God has for you, because He knows what you want but better yet he knows what you NEED.

Ruth was a women in the bible who had a perfect reason to be discontent. Widowed at a young age, her circumstances provided her the perfect breeding ground for bitterness and self-pity.  Yet Ruth chose to cling to God, who she found to be trustworthy in her difficult circumstances. I encourage you all who have not heard or read the story of Ruth to read it ( It’s in the old testament of the Bible). It will help you to remain faithful, to rely on God, and to continue to wait on God.

When you run ahead of God’s timing for your life you cause pain and suffering that could have been avoided if you were just patient and waited .Being single can be difficult enough for a woman, but believe you me a heartbreak from being “led on” by a man can lead to a ditch of discontentment.  Many women suffer for years with having trust issues and being emotionally scarred from falling into the arms of a counterfeit and it takes them years to recover and rediscover the capacity to trust any male in their life.

Misread intentions between males and females put them on a collision course. Daily, women’s hearts are broken because they allow their emotions to run ahead of their commitments. As a result, they end up emotionally crippled, angry at the men who failed to live up to their emotional fantasies. We need to keep our emotions in check and not be so quick to feed into how we are “feeling”.

                                  Everyone has someone but me =(  

I can speak first hand how it feels to have everyone around you in a relationship in love and just living life, and your sitting there like a bump on a log. It’s hard, and you start to feel  a certain way of about where you stand marital wise. As I started to grow in God and spend time with him more and more I started to become more content with where I am. I started to see how valuable my quiet time was with God. God was able to download things into my spirit about me and give me a self evaluation in areas where I was not whole. I still desire to find Love and live happily ever after but in these years of singleness God had to show me, ME! I thought I was fine the way I was but boy was I wrong. I had some things I needed to work on and he needed me to seek him more, so he could get me to where he needed me to be in HIM. I look at my relationship with God  like an actual relationship. When your in a relationship with someone and you enjoy their presence and just being around them 24/7. That’s how I feel about God. I love being in his presence whether it’s through worship, prayer, listening to a teaching even on my commute to work where I am just talking to him.

God has revealed so much about myself throughout this season and I am glad he did because I was a mess and no man wants an unstable woman.  Enjoy your singleness and be content.  Do not focus on what everyone else has or is doing. God will bless you and give you your heart’s desire when it’s time.

Reason why you could still be single

1) God is saving you from something or someone, The men that could be approaching you does not have your best interest at heart.

2) He needs you to get yourself together before he blesses you with his best. ( God dont bless no mess)

3) God wants  your full undivided attention

4) It’s not your time

5) Your not ready

6) God can’t trust you

We need to get to a place where we are so content that we get tired of going ahead of God and say ” Lord, I’m waving my white flag, whenever your ready…. I’m giving it to you”. That’s where I’m at! I was so tired of daydreaming about this special, one of a kind love and nothing was happening. It felt like the more attention I gave to my situation the further I felt from seeing it happen. I got tired and told God whenever he is ready he can send him! I will never forget my mom told me, the longer you sit here thinking about it and daydreaming about it, the longer it’s going to take.

I like to think of it as a pregnancy test. Now I’ve never took a pregnancy test but I’ve watched enough Youtube Videos and heard from family and friends their experiences. The waiting period of finding out the results of whether or not your pregnant is very nerve wrecking and it seems to take forever. When your anticipating an answer and you’re unsure of the future and what it holds, you want to know NOW what’s going on you will drive yourself crazy. Pacing back and forth, and thinking of all the possibilities the time tends to goes by super slow to the point where your on the verge of ripping your hair out and biting your nails down to your cuticles. However if you keep yourself busy and distract yourself while your waiting for the test results it tends to go by quicker.

(I hope you guys understand where I was going with that.)

When you start to focus on being in a relationship and having that someone who makes you feel all warm and fuzzy, you can easily start to worship the idea. You do not want to get to that place. Love is a beautiful thing but do not make that your primary thought.

Songs of Solomon 8:4 I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem, that ye stir not up, nor awake my love, until he please.

(Word of Encouragement)

When you form a relationship with God while your in your singleness and you spend quality/ genuine time with Him  ( not just spending time so that you can be blessed and its not a pure thing… really send time with God  intentionally),and let him work on you and mold you into who he has created you to be. You will realize your worth,  who you are in Christ and the power you hold and most important how to LOVE yourself, you won’t settle just to have someone. When you love yourself you do not let anyone devalue your self worth.

You will get to the point where you want what GOD wants for you. You will be so content with your singleness that you wont give room for a counterfeit to come in and ruin what God has for you. God will give you the understanding and knowledge of who He is  and is capable of doing.  He has you covered. Be patient and wait on God. Focus on you, get yourself together spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically.

Work on breaking the cycles that have hindered you in the past  such as being quick to anger, jumping to conclusions, speaking before thinking, speaking before listening and understanding, being contentious, jealousy, bitterness, being insecure ,ect. When God brings His best for you, you  won’t have to  worry about  going backwards and going through the motions of what damaged you in the beginning because those cycles have been broken.

What God has for you is going to make you Thank God that you waited!!!!

xoxo Z.M ❤

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